Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Well, At Least It Looks Like Accountability

I've been a while thinking about how I was going to address the topic of the Liberal sponsorship scandal. Apparently the time is now to post it because my family is getting tired of me ranting about it.

I'm not ranting about the scandal - that's been done to death. I will grant conservatives in this country that the Liberals stole a bunch of money, gave it to their friends and then played hide the salami with the Canadian public. All in a nearly failed attempt to keep Quebec in Canada.

However, it is absolutely hypocritical of the Conservative party, the Bloc, the NDP or any other party to suggest that the Liberals are alone in committing these kinds of shenanigans. Helping your friends who own advertising companies once you win the election and form a government is one of the time honoured kick-back schemes of the modern political era. The Conservatives did it all through the 80's. The big difference now is that the Liberals got caught. I'm not excusing them for their actions. I just can't handle Steven Harper crowing his moral outrage over something that his own party has done in the past and probably would do again if given half the chance.

So, now we have a Christmas election campaign with a January 23, 2006 election date. The end result of which will be:

Liberal sponsorship scandal $100 Million
Cost of the Gomery inquiry $80 Million
Cost of a Federal election $170 Million (cost of the 1997 election)

That's not counting the dollars that the parties will spend on their respective campaigns. Figure that at probably another $100 Million total.

What will you get for your $450 Million. Another Liberal minority, a separatist Bloc opposition, an even more ineffective NDP and a despondent Steven Harper.

See, there's one bright spot. Maybe after this he'll join the illustrious ranks of failed and ridiculed Federal Conservative Leaders. He'll be in great company with Stock, Brian and Joe.

Personally, I'd just call it even. Round up everybody that Gomery fingers (figuratively you sickos) in his report and put them on trial. Then, if any politicians get convicted, hold regional bi-elections to solve any missing MP problems.

Nah... let's just waste the $270 Million to retain the status quo. That's what we do best.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

Unlike Invading a Sovereign Country

"The granting of the turkey pardon is not a responsibility that I take lightly," Bush added.

Uh Huh. The best part about the pardoned turkeys... Bush sent them to Disneyland.

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

If I Wanted to Touch a Turkey, I'd Just Lean to My Left

Sometimes, these things just write themselves...

Insert favourite, "Presidential/turkey joke" here.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Everything's Just So... Chinesey

"Here you go crazy Gwai Lo lady. I hope you like the flowers. They cost more than my village makes in a month."

I'm shocked at how publicly well-haved Dubya's been on his little Asian junket.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

Talk About A Burning Ring of Fire

I should probably start off any post that will be talking about country music with the disclaimer: "I hate country music". That said, I love Johnny Cash. Maybe it's a comfort thing; growing up around my dad and my uncles, being indoctrinated to the magic of Johnny Cash, Merle Haggert, Willie Nelson, Waylon Jennings, Hank Williams ie/real country musicians. I guess really what I loathe is the overproduced, euro-pop, pseudo country music that's coming from Nashville these days.

Cut to last night and the travesty that was CBS's I Walk the Line, A Night for Johnny Cash. CBS owes the Cash family a massive apology for that horrendous monstrosity. There were some highlights of course. Nora Jones was spectacular, Brad Paisley ripped "Folsom Prison Blues" in the opening number - really cool. However watching Jerry Lee Lewis and Kid Rock (Kid Rock for Christ sake) mangle "I Walk the Line" made my ears bleed.

aside: Where in the hell did they dig Jerry Lee Lewis up? It's got to be embarrassing for someone who used to play the piano with his right heel to be propped up against the keys like a wooden cutout of your former self. To pair a musical legend with Kid "I a cowboy bay-be" Rock is insulting.

Anyways, back to Johnny Cash spinning in his grave... U2 was boring, Montgomery Gentry was weird, Kid Rock needed meds, Jerry Lee was sad. The bright spots were the women and the new kid. Sheryl Crow's rendition of "Ring of Fire" was at least interesting and Nora Jones was the class act of the night. I'd never even heard of Brad Paisley before. Wow. That kid can play.

Plus. I think Kris Kristopherson is starting to look like everybody's friendly uncle.

Thursday, November 03, 2005

Suddenly NWA Doesn't Sound So... Wrong

Remember Easy E, Dr. Dre, Ice Cube et...? Remember all the trouble they got into when they were the first to be "hard core gangsta rappers"? Remember all the cops and community groups being up in arms over "Fuck the po-lice"?

Well... fuck the police. At least in Alberta anyways. Maybe to be more accurate, fuck the Solicitor General. Thanks to new legislation in Alberta, if the police harass, abuse, assault, batter or go all Rodney King on you, you have one year to make a complaint. Didn't make it in a year because maybe you were too traumatized or hospitalized or afraid of reprisals? Too bad for you. Now there's a statute of limitations on police "complaints".

No other group of professionals has this protection. Doctors, lawyers, engineers, dentists, paramedics, firefighters - people who work for the public good; can have complaints leveled against them at any time after the "incident" took place. Why do the police need this level of so-called protection?

Hey, look I made it through three paragraphs without even mentioning the group of right-wing retards that live south of the 49th parallel. So, here you go. Damned animals just get in the way anyhow. Do what you can to help stop this atrocity. Make sure you watch the ad in the media section. It's really clever.

o.k. I'm done.