Dammit Jim I'm a Doctor, Not a Life Coach

O.K. Anybody, no check that everybody out there, walking around with a Bluetooth headset on... you look like a star trek convention reject!!! Look at this guy.
He's connected. He's plugged in. He's... got a pole crammed so far up his ass, it's tickling his throat. Clearly, he likes his headset a little more than would be considered healthy, or socially acceptable.

I find that the one with the little blinking blue LED is especially annoying. Don't even get me started on the Oakley RAZRWIRE. I mean really, it's too hard to hold the phone up to your ear? Your shades get in the way of the phone? You have the compelling need to talk to thin air while maintaining some sort of creepy, not-quite-eye contact with the person in front of you?

Here's my thought. Some people have people. Some people have Bluetooth. I'll bet you Donald Trump doesn't have a Bluetooth headset set. Why? He has people. I'll bet you an equal amount of money that the Donald's people have Bluetooth. Why?

Because they're busy. Busy busy busy.

That's what a Bluetooth headset says to the world. "I'm a busy person being busy. I'm so busy I don't have the time to take my ringing phone out of my pocket, flip it open and talk. I just talk. Talk talk talk. To other busy people. And all of us busy busy talkers are talking on behalf of our masters. Because we're "people"."

That's what a Bluetooth headset says. That, and you're possibly retarded.